This league just cannot get going this year, most of the blame probably (probably = does) go to the league Commish. That's me. I've got got plenty of excuses, but that's all they are.. excuses so I won't bore anybody with them. Regardless, the league is moving forward but because of my ineptness and Bambi running out in front on Billy this past weekend I didn't get a review of the week posted before rankings came out. Anyway, here they are with league match-ups for the week:
#4 Crass vs. #10 Cloughs. Will Cloughs Chris Rainey addition put him over the hump? Can his WRs even see the football this week?
#7 Billy vs. #8 Joe-Dub in a battle of probably ranked too low teams
#2 Brian vs. #5 T-Raz. Intriguing match-up as T-Raz recently put his QBs on the block to try to bolster his squad for the stretch run.
#1 Cherns vs. #11 Zach in a battle of Marawood powers. Could Cherns return years of beatdowns?
#6 Josh vs. #9 Fat Joe- If a tree falls in the woods and nobody hears, does it make a sound?
#3 Scuba vs. #12 Perrins. Perrins looking for an upset and credibility before he loses his locker room.. again
September 22, 2011
September 16, 2011
Week 3 Preview
The league is finally underway and things appear to be running a tad more smoothly. That's the good news, the bad news is that it's still early in the year and nobody knows what they really have until conference play. That doesn't mean I won't try to preview this week though, lets take a look at what we've got. Sticking with this week's ranking theme it appears the old-school WWF is continuing to make a comeback. Thanks youtube for these vintage finishing moves! POWERRRRRRRRRBOMB!
#1 Bill vs. #6 Brian
Bill is a perennial league power, as we all know. The guy wins titles and games he shouldn't win, he's really the Les Miles of our league. Gusty calls, crazy antics, and a roster full of guys that could implode at any minute is what he's all about. Bill has yet to release a line-up this week, so some coaches think it's just another one of his head games. We do know that Andrew Luck will be leading the charge for the often-maligned and at times, low self-esteemed head coach.
Brian, on the other hand, wasted no time letting Billy know what he was up against and to be honest.. it's not much. Aaron Murray directs the squad with Trent Richardson and Cyrus Gray in the backfield. The WRs aren't even worth mentioning, his TE is best known for his funny first name, Orson, but his defense a great match-up in Penn State playing the vaunted Temple Owls offense. One time, I saw a Wisconsin team beat Temple 65-0. The game was such a massacre that Luke Knauf logged a play at center (and fumbled the snap) and Dywon Rowan went bananas late in the game looking like Barry Sanders.
Prediction: Without knowing what Bill brings to the table, I think he's going down. Brian has been knocking on the league door for years now. This is the day that he powerbombs his way to the league leaders. Brian by a 123-115 score.
#7 T-Raz vs. #9 Fat Joe
I thought this was the worst game of the week until I remembered Crass played Perrins also. T-Raz and Fat Joe used to be roomies, I believe.. along with Perrins. Yes, folks.. that is the 7, 9, and 11th ranked teams in the league.. out of 12. That shows the overall ability and brain function that was in that apartment. Of course, hearing the recent news about UW-Madison and their "reverse discrimination" we have to wonder if any of these 3 would even make it into school anymore. None of that matters here, we don't discriminate, we're equal opportunity haters!
Fat Joe released his line-up earlier this week and went with Montee Ball against the vaunted NIU defense that gave up 45 points to Kansas last weekend. Ball might be all that Fat Joe needs to beat his former roomie. T-Raz doesn't have much in the tank unless Russ Wilson throws the ball a bunch and Kendall Wright catches 30 passes against Stephen F. Austin. That's possible.. so what's the verdict?
Prediction: Fat Joe Stone Cold Stuns T-Raz back to next week, 117-109.
#8 Crass vs. #11 Perrins
This might be the most entertaining game of the week.. if you like bad football. Rankings wise, it's clearly the worst match-up. 8 vs. 11. Crass has been near the league top before, heck, these are the 2nd and 3rd ranked teams from the league last year! Now they are near the bottom, just rock bottom. Crass has eeked out a win and Perrins.. well, despite the annual "I have the best skill position players in the league" rant just never can win the big games. He's got more excuses than a 35 year old lifelong criminal, he makes politicians look like they're telling the truth.
Perrins did get his own line-up in (Nice job) and has some nice WRs. Broyles, Fuller, and Woods can score in any league against anybody; they're legit studs. He'll need more out of James White this week and a big effort from Matt "The Golden Boy" Barkley if he's going to get a win. Crass counters with Collaros, a steady diet of solid RBs (Taylor, Stewart, and Randle) along with a smart play in USC WR Robert Woods.
Prediction: This will be a close game from start to finish; I think that USC does just enough against a bad Syracuse team to help Matt Barkley finish with 275+ yards and 3 TDs as Perrins gets on the board by delivering a Razor's Edge to Crass in a 133-120 win.
#3 Cherns vs. #10 Cloughs
These two have been bickering via email, text message, and even the phone on occasion the last few years, and when they lived together there was no love lost between the two of them. In fact, it wasn't uncommon for friendly Xbox games to turn heated and smack talk to be delivered. Rumors persist they still don't really like each other, but just talk because that's what society expects from the two of them. This tension has carried over to the league as Cherns constantly berates the Commish for his lack of smarts, his teams that always lose, and on occasion, his personal hygiene. We all know the Commish gets the last laugh because his team motto is, "If it ain't me winning, it ain't going to be Cherns." and Cherns hasn't finished in the money yet.
Cherns loves the Texas Tech QBs and LaMichael James but what can he get from Marques Wilson and Theo Riddick at WR? He didn't get much from Vick Ballard last night. The Commish counters with a favorable match-up for his Baylor guys in Stephen F. Austin. He hopes Terrence Williams and Terrence Gannaway go bonkers against the FCS team. If Paul Richardson has half the game he did last week (288 yards receiving) and Oregon remembers they are playing Missouri State things could get interesting.
Prediction: You heard it here first, the Oregon defense figure 4 leglocks up Mizzou State and the hounds go wild on Cherns knocking him down another inch to 5'6. 121-107
#1 Bill vs. #6 Brian
Bill is a perennial league power, as we all know. The guy wins titles and games he shouldn't win, he's really the Les Miles of our league. Gusty calls, crazy antics, and a roster full of guys that could implode at any minute is what he's all about. Bill has yet to release a line-up this week, so some coaches think it's just another one of his head games. We do know that Andrew Luck will be leading the charge for the often-maligned and at times, low self-esteemed head coach.
Brian, on the other hand, wasted no time letting Billy know what he was up against and to be honest.. it's not much. Aaron Murray directs the squad with Trent Richardson and Cyrus Gray in the backfield. The WRs aren't even worth mentioning, his TE is best known for his funny first name, Orson, but his defense a great match-up in Penn State playing the vaunted Temple Owls offense. One time, I saw a Wisconsin team beat Temple 65-0. The game was such a massacre that Luke Knauf logged a play at center (and fumbled the snap) and Dywon Rowan went bananas late in the game looking like Barry Sanders.
Prediction: Without knowing what Bill brings to the table, I think he's going down. Brian has been knocking on the league door for years now. This is the day that he powerbombs his way to the league leaders. Brian by a 123-115 score.
#2 Joe vs. #5 Josh (GOTW)
In our Game of the Week, Joe takes on a pesky Josh squad. We all know the early Bret Bielema type blunder that cost the Badgers a game against Michigan State a few years ago.. Josh made the same type of mistake the other week by NOT STARTING A QB. Really, and he only lost by 3 points. That's a double edge sword, he obviously has a great team but can his old, decaying brain stay sharp and on top of things? We don't know and that's why he's ranked #5 and not #1.
Joe has been a pleasant surprise thus far, predicted by some to be at the rock bottom of the league, he's off to a 2-0 start. He has solid QBs (Cousins and Scheelhause) and a plethora of backs including that always reliable main back in Virginia Tech and Cal. Joe also reinstated the always drunk driving, but always wide open, Michael Floyd. Floyd is the key to this roster every week, and we all know he's due for a letdown here and there.. after all, he's gotta stop drinking sooner or later.
Prediction: Josh remembers to field an entire roster, Marcus Lattimore is too tough for the Navy defense to slow down as he pulls out an upset victory despite a lackluster performance from Landry Jones and Ray Graham as he Pearl River Plunges Joe into a table.. AND a car. 115-103
Prediction: Josh remembers to field an entire roster, Marcus Lattimore is too tough for the Navy defense to slow down as he pulls out an upset victory despite a lackluster performance from Landry Jones and Ray Graham as he Pearl River Plunges Joe into a table.. AND a car. 115-103
I thought this was the worst game of the week until I remembered Crass played Perrins also. T-Raz and Fat Joe used to be roomies, I believe.. along with Perrins. Yes, folks.. that is the 7, 9, and 11th ranked teams in the league.. out of 12. That shows the overall ability and brain function that was in that apartment. Of course, hearing the recent news about UW-Madison and their "reverse discrimination" we have to wonder if any of these 3 would even make it into school anymore. None of that matters here, we don't discriminate, we're equal opportunity haters!
Fat Joe released his line-up earlier this week and went with Montee Ball against the vaunted NIU defense that gave up 45 points to Kansas last weekend. Ball might be all that Fat Joe needs to beat his former roomie. T-Raz doesn't have much in the tank unless Russ Wilson throws the ball a bunch and Kendall Wright catches 30 passes against Stephen F. Austin. That's possible.. so what's the verdict?
Prediction: Fat Joe Stone Cold Stuns T-Raz back to next week, 117-109.
#8 Crass vs. #11 Perrins
This might be the most entertaining game of the week.. if you like bad football. Rankings wise, it's clearly the worst match-up. 8 vs. 11. Crass has been near the league top before, heck, these are the 2nd and 3rd ranked teams from the league last year! Now they are near the bottom, just rock bottom. Crass has eeked out a win and Perrins.. well, despite the annual "I have the best skill position players in the league" rant just never can win the big games. He's got more excuses than a 35 year old lifelong criminal, he makes politicians look like they're telling the truth.
Perrins did get his own line-up in (Nice job) and has some nice WRs. Broyles, Fuller, and Woods can score in any league against anybody; they're legit studs. He'll need more out of James White this week and a big effort from Matt "The Golden Boy" Barkley if he's going to get a win. Crass counters with Collaros, a steady diet of solid RBs (Taylor, Stewart, and Randle) along with a smart play in USC WR Robert Woods.
Prediction: This will be a close game from start to finish; I think that USC does just enough against a bad Syracuse team to help Matt Barkley finish with 275+ yards and 3 TDs as Perrins gets on the board by delivering a Razor's Edge to Crass in a 133-120 win.
#3 Cherns vs. #10 Cloughs
These two have been bickering via email, text message, and even the phone on occasion the last few years, and when they lived together there was no love lost between the two of them. In fact, it wasn't uncommon for friendly Xbox games to turn heated and smack talk to be delivered. Rumors persist they still don't really like each other, but just talk because that's what society expects from the two of them. This tension has carried over to the league as Cherns constantly berates the Commish for his lack of smarts, his teams that always lose, and on occasion, his personal hygiene. We all know the Commish gets the last laugh because his team motto is, "If it ain't me winning, it ain't going to be Cherns." and Cherns hasn't finished in the money yet.
Cherns loves the Texas Tech QBs and LaMichael James but what can he get from Marques Wilson and Theo Riddick at WR? He didn't get much from Vick Ballard last night. The Commish counters with a favorable match-up for his Baylor guys in Stephen F. Austin. He hopes Terrence Williams and Terrence Gannaway go bonkers against the FCS team. If Paul Richardson has half the game he did last week (288 yards receiving) and Oregon remembers they are playing Missouri State things could get interesting.
Prediction: You heard it here first, the Oregon defense figure 4 leglocks up Mizzou State and the hounds go wild on Cherns knocking him down another inch to 5'6. 121-107
#4 Scuba Steve vs. #12 Zach
Can Zach get a win? Can Scuba back up his #4 ranking, the highest he's been? There are a lot of questions in this match-up of an owner with a year of experience and a brand new expansion team. Scuba got a break last year when he took over a bad roster, but at least he had one. Zach had to start this thing all on his own and took a youth movement to the league drafting a lot of young talent, but not much that helps this year. He was active in the FA market as school president, Jerry Sinz, told him he expects wins this year. (Sinz really isn't a college president, this is fake). Zach went back and watched some Edgar film this weekend and also went by Stratford to pick the legendary brain of Cal Tackes. He said he's learned a lot in the last few days.. but will it be enough to get a win? Only time will tell.
To get that win he'll have to go through Heisman Candidate, RGIII and big time WRs in Alshon Jeffrey and Da'Rick Rodgers. Zach will counter with new QB, Brock Osweiler facing a terrible Illinois defense, he also added fellow Sundevil Aaron Pfuffualfualufguard in hopes of forming a 1-2 punch.
Prediction: Zach steps up like a man.. and Scuba puts him down like a man. Scuba goes wild and yoko-bombs his way to a 142-98 victory.
To get that win he'll have to go through Heisman Candidate, RGIII and big time WRs in Alshon Jeffrey and Da'Rick Rodgers. Zach will counter with new QB, Brock Osweiler facing a terrible Illinois defense, he also added fellow Sundevil Aaron Pfuffualfualufguard in hopes of forming a 1-2 punch.
Prediction: Zach steps up like a man.. and Scuba puts him down like a man. Scuba goes wild and yoko-bombs his way to a 142-98 victory.
July 6, 2011
Mega Running Update
So, I got a little behind on this, thankfully I have that trusty Garmin Forerunner! I love that thing. I also ran into a bit of a problem with that as the charger wouldn't charge it; I was nervous it was the watch that was shot. I called and didn't even really have to hassle around much; they sent me a new charger that took a few days to get. It was a little funny because when I got it and plugged it in, it didn't charge instantly and I took a deep nervous breath.. seconds later the charge caught. That's been the craziest experience that I can think of through all of this, except, of course the Grandma's Marathon which I'll blog about later. And the few "recovery" runs I've done since then.. you know the ones that you go really slow and feel like your hamstring is going to tear, shred, and or/pop every step?
Anyway.. are you ready for this?
Saturday, May 21st: 6.37 miles in 45:58
Sunday, May 22nd: 2.2 miles in 15:58
Monday, May 23rd: 4.15 miles in 30:37
Tuesday, May 24th: 2.10 miles in 14:05
Wednesday, May 25th: 2.21 miles in 14:02
Thursday, May 26th: 5.38 miles in 36:42
Friday, May 27th: 7.03 miles in 49:36
Week Total: 29.44 miles in 3 hours 26 minutes and 58 seconds
Saturday, May 28th: 9.01 miles in 1:25.03 (group run)
Sunday, May 29th: 3.88 miles in 30:01
Monday, May 30th: 2.2 miles in 15:48
Tuesday, May 31st: 4.1 miles in 28:07
Wednesday, June 1st: 7 miles in 57:05
Thursday, June 2nd: 2.15 miles in 13:38
Friday, June 3rd: 6.13 miles in 44:13
Week Total: 34.47 miles in 4 hours 33 minutes and 55 seconds
Sunday, June 26th: 4.01 miles in 30:57
Monday, June 27th: 2.15 miles 17:52
Tuesday, June 28th: 1 mile in cargo shorts in about 8:30
Wednesday, June 29th: 2 miles in 13:52
Thursday, June 30th: 1 mile in 7:50
Friday, July 1st: 2.36 miles in 17:06
Week Total: 13.67 miles in 1 hour 45 minutes and 15 seconds
Total mileage in these 49 days: 201.31
Total time in these 49 days: 25 hours 2 minutes and 29 secondsPace: 7:27/mile
Total mileage from start: 422.22 miles
Total time from start: 52 hours, 2 minutes and 22 seconds
Pace: 7:23/mile
Goals:
Finish at 7:20/mile or less
Add 2 more marathons
Get better at blogging about this
Not get hurt
Anyway.. are you ready for this?
Saturday, May 14th: 11.48 miles in 1:38.10 (group run)
Sunday, May 15th: 2.14 miles in 15:54
Monday, May 16th: 8.12 miles in 59:50
Tuesday, May 17th: 6.01 miles in 37:40
Wednesday, May 18th: 3.06 miles in 23:04
Thursday, May 19th: 7.01 miles in 50:03
Friday, May 20th: 4.12 miles in 31:57
Week Total: 41.94 miles in 5 hours 16 minutes and 38 seconds
Sunday, May 15th: 2.14 miles in 15:54
Monday, May 16th: 8.12 miles in 59:50
Tuesday, May 17th: 6.01 miles in 37:40
Wednesday, May 18th: 3.06 miles in 23:04
Thursday, May 19th: 7.01 miles in 50:03
Friday, May 20th: 4.12 miles in 31:57
Week Total: 41.94 miles in 5 hours 16 minutes and 38 seconds
Saturday, May 21st: 6.37 miles in 45:58
Sunday, May 22nd: 2.2 miles in 15:58
Monday, May 23rd: 4.15 miles in 30:37
Tuesday, May 24th: 2.10 miles in 14:05
Wednesday, May 25th: 2.21 miles in 14:02
Thursday, May 26th: 5.38 miles in 36:42
Friday, May 27th: 7.03 miles in 49:36
Week Total: 29.44 miles in 3 hours 26 minutes and 58 seconds
Saturday, May 28th: 9.01 miles in 1:25.03 (group run)
Sunday, May 29th: 3.88 miles in 30:01
Monday, May 30th: 2.2 miles in 15:48
Tuesday, May 31st: 4.1 miles in 28:07
Wednesday, June 1st: 7 miles in 57:05
Thursday, June 2nd: 2.15 miles in 13:38
Friday, June 3rd: 6.13 miles in 44:13
Week Total: 34.47 miles in 4 hours 33 minutes and 55 seconds
Saturday, June 4th: 10.88 miles in 1:37.36 (group run)
Sunday, June 5th: 5.43 miles in 38:28
Monday, June 6th: 2.12 miles in 15:47
Tuesday, June 7th: 2.12 miles in 14:34
Wednesday, June 8th: 2.19 miles in 15:28
Thursday, June 9th: 2.19 miles in 15:50
Friday, June 10th: 2.24 miles in 16:14
Week Total: 27.17 miles in 3 hours 33 minutes and 57 seconds
Sunday, June 5th: 5.43 miles in 38:28
Monday, June 6th: 2.12 miles in 15:47
Tuesday, June 7th: 2.12 miles in 14:34
Wednesday, June 8th: 2.19 miles in 15:28
Thursday, June 9th: 2.19 miles in 15:50
Friday, June 10th: 2.24 miles in 16:14
Week Total: 27.17 miles in 3 hours 33 minutes and 57 seconds
Saturday, June 11th: 2 miles in 20 (WALLEYE RUN)
Sunday, June 12th: 5.23 miles in 36:36
Monday, June 13th: 4.25 miles in 29:05
Tuesday, June 14th: 2.15 miles in 15:46
Wednesday, June 15th: 3.05 miles in 23:59
Thursday, June 16th: 1.10 miles in 8:10
Friday, June 17th: 4.14 miles in 32:06
Week total: 21.92 miles in 2 hours 45 minutes and 42 seconds
Sunday, June 12th: 5.23 miles in 36:36
Monday, June 13th: 4.25 miles in 29:05
Tuesday, June 14th: 2.15 miles in 15:46
Wednesday, June 15th: 3.05 miles in 23:59
Thursday, June 16th: 1.10 miles in 8:10
Friday, June 17th: 4.14 miles in 32:06
Week total: 21.92 miles in 2 hours 45 minutes and 42 seconds
Saturday, June 18th: 26.39 miles in 3:27.21 (7:22, 7:03, 7:10, 7:05, 7:16, 7:42, 7:08, 7:19, 7:17, 6:58, 7:23, 7:18, 7:10, 7:38, 7:14, 7:15, 7:35, 7:33, 7:55, 9:41, 8:05, 8:50, 8:59, 9:04, 9:34, 9:23, and .31 in 2:52)
Sunday, June 19th: 1.01 miles in 9:02
Monday, June 20th: 1.08 miles in 9:16
Tuesday, June 21st: 1.08 miles in 9:19
Wednesday, June 22nd: 1 mile in 8:58
Thursday, June 23rd: 1.06 miles in 9:04
Friday, June 24th: 1.08 miles in 9:04
Week Total: 32.7 miles in 4 hours 22 minutes and 4 seconds
Saturday, June 25th: 1.15 miles in 9:08Sunday, June 19th: 1.01 miles in 9:02
Monday, June 20th: 1.08 miles in 9:16
Tuesday, June 21st: 1.08 miles in 9:19
Wednesday, June 22nd: 1 mile in 8:58
Thursday, June 23rd: 1.06 miles in 9:04
Friday, June 24th: 1.08 miles in 9:04
Week Total: 32.7 miles in 4 hours 22 minutes and 4 seconds
Sunday, June 26th: 4.01 miles in 30:57
Monday, June 27th: 2.15 miles 17:52
Tuesday, June 28th: 1 mile in cargo shorts in about 8:30
Wednesday, June 29th: 2 miles in 13:52
Thursday, June 30th: 1 mile in 7:50
Friday, July 1st: 2.36 miles in 17:06
Week Total: 13.67 miles in 1 hour 45 minutes and 15 seconds
Total mileage in these 49 days: 201.31
Total time in these 49 days: 25 hours 2 minutes and 29 secondsPace: 7:27/mile
Total mileage from start: 422.22 miles
Total time from start: 52 hours, 2 minutes and 22 seconds
Pace: 7:23/mile
Goals:
Finish at 7:20/mile or less
Add 2 more marathons
Get better at blogging about this
Not get hurt
July 5, 2011
Week 6: 365 Day Challenge
Day 36 (May 7): 5.45 miles in 42:39
(This was a run after a day at a Coaches Clinic a little bit later in the afternoon. I really tried to focus on just running without worrying about pace at all, and for the 1st time I really did that by myself. I had 2 miles over 8 minutes and that NEVER happens when I run. I enjoyed the light jog.
Day 37: 4.32 miles in 30:49
(It's starting to heat up in Springfield, today included. I'm not looking forward to the next few days with temperatures that could hit up to 90!!)
Day 38: 6.37 miles in 48:16. Solid run, bit of a wind.. bad time of the year for that. Up to this point, hottest run of the year.. tomorrow is supposed to be worse.
Day 39: 6.00 miles in 38:32. (6x1 mile repeats today. 90 degrees. Mega wind. Not cool. 6:26, 5:56, 6:19, 6:41, 6:38, and 6:29. Hmmm which miles were into the wind? Oh, 4 and 5. Out of gas on 6.)
Day 40: 2.14 miles in 16:16
Day 41: 6.7 miles in 44:15
Day 42 (May 13): 2.14 miles in 15:48
Week 6: 33.12 miles in 3 hours, 56 minutes and 35 seconds.
Pace: 7:08/mile
Okay, the next update is going to be HUGE from May 13th until the start of this week.. this could take awhile but I have to clear my watch out because it has so much stored on it, I believe.
(This was a run after a day at a Coaches Clinic a little bit later in the afternoon. I really tried to focus on just running without worrying about pace at all, and for the 1st time I really did that by myself. I had 2 miles over 8 minutes and that NEVER happens when I run. I enjoyed the light jog.
Day 37: 4.32 miles in 30:49
(It's starting to heat up in Springfield, today included. I'm not looking forward to the next few days with temperatures that could hit up to 90!!)
Day 38: 6.37 miles in 48:16. Solid run, bit of a wind.. bad time of the year for that. Up to this point, hottest run of the year.. tomorrow is supposed to be worse.
Day 39: 6.00 miles in 38:32. (6x1 mile repeats today. 90 degrees. Mega wind. Not cool. 6:26, 5:56, 6:19, 6:41, 6:38, and 6:29. Hmmm which miles were into the wind? Oh, 4 and 5. Out of gas on 6.)
Day 40: 2.14 miles in 16:16
Day 41: 6.7 miles in 44:15
Day 42 (May 13): 2.14 miles in 15:48
Week 6: 33.12 miles in 3 hours, 56 minutes and 35 seconds.
Pace: 7:08/mile
Okay, the next update is going to be HUGE from May 13th until the start of this week.. this could take awhile but I have to clear my watch out because it has so much stored on it, I believe.
May 18, 2011
Team Preview: 1st Place "Scuba Steve"
Am I crazy? Perhaps, I am not the smartest man around and never have been accused as such. Scuba is coming to the league taking over a once depleted roster, bare bones, full of Michigan players and transfers that amounted to.. well... nothing about the same as Rich Rodriguez accomplished there. Then, after one season, he could potentially be first. The league may investigate this turnaround, it's John Calipari like, and everybody except the NCAA apparently knows where there's smoke.. there's fire.
Speaking of fire, where's there is fire and gunshots; there is often Seagal. He is everywhere. I wasn't sure which Seagal movie to use, but I went with one of my favorites, at least, one that I knew some of the plot "On Deadly Ground". The plot is something like, an oil company makes money on Eskimo ground and has faulty equipment. An oil rig blows up, and they try to cover corners, but Seagal knows about their dirty tactics. Seagal, naturally, one with nature undergoes a vision quest and learns the truth. The dirty oil company comes to the village blazing and angers Seagal (UH OH). Seagal eludes the bad guys while killing any that stand in his way til he gets to the top and drowns the dude in his own oil... AND BLOWS IT UP! The best part? He doesn't get charged for any crimes AND delivers a speech to end the movie at an Alaska state convention. That, my friends, is a movie.
Huh? Who cares about Scuba's roster.. I was just in a zone remembering "On Deadly Ground," how does that compare to Scuba's roster? Well, like I said, Scuba came from nowhere just like Seagal in the movie, just there.. minding his own business. Then bam, he's in place and has to take down the rest of the league trying to keep the new guy down. He's allegedly undergone a visionquest which told him to trade for Robert Griffin. He became one with the land and now has WR's like Jermaine Kearse and Alshon Jeffrey. He's as fast as a deer on the ground with Kniles Davis. So, he's kind of Seagal or Norris in Walker, Texas Ranger.
Best Player: Alshon Jeffrey
Breakout Player: Robert Griffin
Most Overrated Player: Jermaine Kearse
You HAVE to watch this unreal clip, I understand it's like 5 minutes.. haha, but it is so hilarious. By the way, who ends a bar fight with the hand slap game for a free punch? Seagal might be the only guy on the planet, thankfully he's so fast.
Speaking of fire, where's there is fire and gunshots; there is often Seagal. He is everywhere. I wasn't sure which Seagal movie to use, but I went with one of my favorites, at least, one that I knew some of the plot "On Deadly Ground". The plot is something like, an oil company makes money on Eskimo ground and has faulty equipment. An oil rig blows up, and they try to cover corners, but Seagal knows about their dirty tactics. Seagal, naturally, one with nature undergoes a vision quest and learns the truth. The dirty oil company comes to the village blazing and angers Seagal (UH OH). Seagal eludes the bad guys while killing any that stand in his way til he gets to the top and drowns the dude in his own oil... AND BLOWS IT UP! The best part? He doesn't get charged for any crimes AND delivers a speech to end the movie at an Alaska state convention. That, my friends, is a movie.
Huh? Who cares about Scuba's roster.. I was just in a zone remembering "On Deadly Ground," how does that compare to Scuba's roster? Well, like I said, Scuba came from nowhere just like Seagal in the movie, just there.. minding his own business. Then bam, he's in place and has to take down the rest of the league trying to keep the new guy down. He's allegedly undergone a visionquest which told him to trade for Robert Griffin. He became one with the land and now has WR's like Jermaine Kearse and Alshon Jeffrey. He's as fast as a deer on the ground with Kniles Davis. So, he's kind of Seagal or Norris in Walker, Texas Ranger.
Best Player: Alshon Jeffrey
Breakout Player: Robert Griffin
Most Overrated Player: Jermaine Kearse
You HAVE to watch this unreal clip, I understand it's like 5 minutes.. haha, but it is so hilarious. By the way, who ends a bar fight with the hand slap game for a free punch? Seagal might be the only guy on the planet, thankfully he's so fast.
Team Preview: 2nd Place "Perrins"
I feel guilty about this position because Perrins lucked his way into a 3rd place finish this past season. At times, he's amazing (Rocky IV) and at other times he is completely lost (Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot). He's built and found a roster that has serious potential just like any Sly movie out there, but he's also Perrins... which means he could implode at any time and just forget to submit a roster or start the completely wrong match up or make a ridiculous trade. That potential is there.
I'm not going to go into the plot line for "Stop, Or My Mom Will Shoot!" because to be honest, I'm not sure there is one. All I know is Sly is a cop of some kind and his mom gets a gun and threatens to shoot somebody. Selective amnesia has turned the rest away from memory, kind of like picking Perrins 2nd will fade from memory immediately after I post this.
Perrins roster is like a good Sly movie: Matt Barkley, T. Pryor (dumbest player alive?), James White, Antwon Bailey, and stacked WR's with Ryan Broyles, Jeff Fuller, and DJ Woods. Scary, scary potential if he hits match-ups and stays healthy. At the same time, however, he has to hit everything right in the draft and line-ups. He could error very easily, just like Sly trying to read this script. How could he think this movie was a good idea? We'll ask that question about Perrins this year... How could he think that line-up was a good idea and it'll be at a key point in the season.
Best Player: Ryan Broyles
Breakout Player: DJ Woods
Most Overrated: Terrelle Pryor
I'm not going to go into the plot line for "Stop, Or My Mom Will Shoot!" because to be honest, I'm not sure there is one. All I know is Sly is a cop of some kind and his mom gets a gun and threatens to shoot somebody. Selective amnesia has turned the rest away from memory, kind of like picking Perrins 2nd will fade from memory immediately after I post this.
Perrins roster is like a good Sly movie: Matt Barkley, T. Pryor (dumbest player alive?), James White, Antwon Bailey, and stacked WR's with Ryan Broyles, Jeff Fuller, and DJ Woods. Scary, scary potential if he hits match-ups and stays healthy. At the same time, however, he has to hit everything right in the draft and line-ups. He could error very easily, just like Sly trying to read this script. How could he think this movie was a good idea? We'll ask that question about Perrins this year... How could he think that line-up was a good idea and it'll be at a key point in the season.
Best Player: Ryan Broyles
Breakout Player: DJ Woods
Most Overrated: Terrelle Pryor
Team Preview: 3rd Place Cherns is Fast And Furious
To the tune of all "The Fast and Furious" movies here comes ........ I didn't know which one to pick, so I lumped them all together. I haven't even seen the new one or Tokyo Drift, but if Tyrese, Vin Diesel, and Paul Walker are in either of them.. they are sure to be bad. Paul Walker reminds me of the kid in a play that's never watched a movie before, never acted, and has no idea what "voice inflection" means. In fact, I've watched movies before, never acted, and have an idea what voice inflection means, which sets me about Paul Walker on the stage. And that's bad, because I am a terrible actor. AWFUL. Sadly, Paul has to fight Tyrese AND Vin to be the worst actor in the movies; an honor which they aren't willing to share. I think they got together in their trailer doing the movie and tried to one-up each other's poor acting skills. I really do. Too bad they don't let Ludacris in on their dirty little secret.. either they kept it from him or he has too much integrity to botch the films.
Regardless, before I spend an entire post discussing Paul Walker's skills, lets talk about somebody whose mouth is Fast and Furious.. our early season projected 3rd place finisher, Cherns. Coming into the league full of sound and fury signifying nothing his mouth hasn't stopped moving. He's not going to slow down anytime soon (like Vin in his 3 second car) because he has T-Magic, Taylor Martinez at QB, LaMichael James, Vick Ballard, Leveon Bell all at the RB position. He, like Walker's dialogue, needs help at WR where he has bodies... but little quality. That will be a position of concern for Cherns entering the draft.
Based on The Fast and Furious movies.. Cherns is Paul Walker. He's an outside that worked in a field to help him (football office) then he left bitterly and joined this league (Vin's gang) where his motives are questioned repeatedly, yet, he seems to rise to the top as a leader. Sadly, the league doesn't have anybody as poorly developed as Tyrese's character to become his sidekick and there is no real muscle man like Vin to lead the charge. Cherns also seems a tad depressed that the league doesn't have a female to fall in love with.. I guess that'll have to change. He probably gets bored going to weddings as a stag.
Best Player: LaMichael James (Last year's Heisman Winner)
Breakout Player: Marques Wilson, WR, Washington State
Most Overrated Player: John Brantley, QB, Florida
Cherns is the kind of guy that may take these quotes and use them in his emails this year, so check back here often to see if he's stealing material.
Regardless, before I spend an entire post discussing Paul Walker's skills, lets talk about somebody whose mouth is Fast and Furious.. our early season projected 3rd place finisher, Cherns. Coming into the league full of sound and fury signifying nothing his mouth hasn't stopped moving. He's not going to slow down anytime soon (like Vin in his 3 second car) because he has T-Magic, Taylor Martinez at QB, LaMichael James, Vick Ballard, Leveon Bell all at the RB position. He, like Walker's dialogue, needs help at WR where he has bodies... but little quality. That will be a position of concern for Cherns entering the draft.
Based on The Fast and Furious movies.. Cherns is Paul Walker. He's an outside that worked in a field to help him (football office) then he left bitterly and joined this league (Vin's gang) where his motives are questioned repeatedly, yet, he seems to rise to the top as a leader. Sadly, the league doesn't have anybody as poorly developed as Tyrese's character to become his sidekick and there is no real muscle man like Vin to lead the charge. Cherns also seems a tad depressed that the league doesn't have a female to fall in love with.. I guess that'll have to change. He probably gets bored going to weddings as a stag.
Best Player: LaMichael James (Last year's Heisman Winner)
Breakout Player: Marques Wilson, WR, Washington State
Most Overrated Player: John Brantley, QB, Florida
Cherns is the kind of guy that may take these quotes and use them in his emails this year, so check back here often to see if he's stealing material.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)