1. Billy (11)-- 5-2, still with the most overall points.. but is 1-2 in his last year and with a tough match-up vs. T-Raz this week. Is the ship sinking? His first 3 weeks were massive outputs 158+ but he hasn't approached it since. Sometimes I think he just wants to take his ball and go home.
2. Chad (1)-- 5-2, 2-2 in his last 4 games. Has hit 150, 126, and 168 in his last 3 and Denard and company seem to have the offense figured out. Commish takes heat every week for these rankings and rulings. With his team winning, he's ruling a little bit stronger than the past, he has confidence and... authoritay.
3. T-Raz-- 5-2, 3-1 in his last 4. 140, 186, 161 and 95 are his point totals in those 4. Key: Gino Smith, T-Raz has some great pieces around him, including that all of a sudden nearly dominant Oregon D that Chad dropped earlier this year. That doesn't change anything, he might try to disguise himself as a complete squad but we know that's a joke. As Gino goes.. he goes.
4. Perrins-- The GMOTY is 4-3, but 3-1 in his last 4. Those 4 games? 114, 107, 168, and 166. He thinks the 168 and 166 are par the course for his expectations. We think that's a small sample size, time will tell as he dodged a bullet already this week with Joe Dub having the Oregon QB's 33 pt performance on the pine. Still shady trade stuff can't get out of people's minds but I don't think he cares.
5. Crass-- 4-3, 2-2 in his last 4. 97, 152, 126 and 104 in his last 4 games. Picked up another Chad drop in Tyler Wilson as he really needs some help at QB. Big game against a suddenly hot Zach squad this weekend. He was in his locker room talking to QBs after practice this week.. he calls them, "mom." No joke.
6. Josh-- 4-3, 3 straight wins posting 130, 70, and 103 in those wins. No joke. Traded his 2 best players and then rattled off win after win, albeit vs. weak competition. Can he get past a lower ranked Cherns who has more explosive players? Kenjon dropped 34 last night, so it's an uphill battle. I've been getting texts about the trade he made and how people can't believe his team can win suddenly. They don't get it.. I don't think he does either. Still working on adding things up.
7. Scuba-- 3-4, 3-1 in his last 4. 167, 154, 101, and 152 are his last 4 totals. Ya, this guy is dangerous with a 3-4 record but the capability to blast anybody on any given Saturday. Looking to keep P90XJoe win less, shouldn't be too tough. Has a ton of points, obviously, but still struggling in wins. Rumors persist he thinks the league isn't "fair" because of the way his team is buried in losses despite all the talent.
8. Joe Dub-- 3-4, 2-2 in his last 4. An unreal 183, then 97 and 89 before 141 last week in his rivalry game with a guy he has never met. Who knows what you'll get when you take on this squad, he's a roller coaster right now, must be what it feels like to be on the debate circuit. He's just trying to get his team to get that 183 spot every week.. and he'll do what it takes.
9. Cherns-- 3-4, 1-3 in his last 4. I think that was about the time he claimed a butterfly in China could flap its wings and he'll win the league title. Around that outlandish claim time, he's gone for.. 94, 148, 77 and 88. We're talking Brian/P90X territory. This is all most owners hear when Cherns gets on his intelectually superior high horse. "When a butterly flaps it's wings in China, I'll win the league. It happens that fast."
10. Zach-- 3-4. 2 straight wins! They were against Cherns and P90X so take it for what it's worth but he did hit 95 and a season high 131 last week. Is this team suddenly buying into the coach's philosophy? A league coach quoted, "Last year nearly every player contacted me about a transfer, this year it was only 4 or 5 guys that were looking to get out. Either they're buying into his program, or they found some boosters to buy their loyalty." Possibly, he did this in the locker room.
11. Brian-- 3-4, but it feels like 0-7. At one point he scored 141 points, since then he hasn't topped 112. In fact, he hasn't topped 74 in the last two weeks including a potentially all time low 48 last week. To put that into perspective, Aaron Rodgers nearly threw for as many points vs. the Texans on Sunday night and several weeks ago, Gino Smith woulda nearly doubled his entire team total. Was still in a stupor coming into the week commenting, "How can I reach these kids?"
12. P90XJoe-- 0-7. Feels like 0-100. Came within 4 points of a win once this season, toppled the 100 point mark last week by 15 but still came up short. Only 5 weeks to go to set the unbeatable, only tieable record of going win less the entire season. The perfect Pollock season is in sight, but lets not talk about it too much or we might jinx it! Perhaps, it's time for Joe to get back in the kitchen.
October 20, 2012
October 12, 2012
Week 6 Rankings
Another week in the books, another week of Billy standing on Mt. Olympus and laughing at the pitiful humans below him.
12. P90X Joe-- After being called out by the resident league bully, Booster Billy, (that's alliteration) P90X Joe went on a tirade never seen before in these fantasy circles. Some say his motivation and intensity might have enabled Uncle Rico to throw a football over them mountains or put Neil Armstrong on the moon, but the old timers.. the guys that have been around before, they saw through the words and saw the real message.. IT WASNT OVER WHEN THE GERMANS BOMBED PEARL HARBOR. Look out Billy.. P90X is 0-6 right now and had a league low 66 points last week. So, lets hope the workout isnt the only thing changing.
11. Zach-- Ripped off another win, locking up former fellow Marawood star, Cherns, 95-77 and displaying that typical Edgar tenacity. QBs can score at will, Ontario Smith might let loose in the Georgia Tech backfield, still searching at WR, but still has the Va Tech defense even though they aren't the d of years past. As Zach walked off the field victorious, he might have forgot how it felt... "Now, what am I doing?" he probably wondered as he sat in his office Sunday getting ready for this week.
10. Joe Dub-- 2-4 with 89 points last week? 3 RBs combined for 17 points, Kicker managed a 1 spot but the defense canceled that out with a -1. Ouch. If I'm Andre Ellington and I'm sitting there on this roster, I might go up to ol' Coach Joe-Dub and ask him, "Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle dixie?" Needs to really make a move to get things going.
9. Scuba-- 759 points. 4th most in the league! Sure looks good. "Ya, but I shoot with this hand." 2-4 record. Not so much. Scored 101 last week, has young talent, a stud senior QB for points.. but can't seem to get the right match-up weekly. A lost season for the record, but solid for his team's development. He's like David Copperfield right now, I'm going to score points and entertain you, but in the end it was just a show and not real.
8. Brian-- 3-3 and coming off a beatdown. 73 points? A whopping 23 points on the bench? You want the truth, Brian? Do you? You can't handle the truth, but I'm going to tell you anyway. Last year was a fluke! Not sure I've seen a fall this far, this fast from near title contention. On the plus side, this team is young with some players that get the ball a lot but need to do more with it.
7. Josh-- 3-3. 2 straight "wins." Thinks his team is on a roll now, last week he won by 4 points. And scored 70 points. That tells you how bad the #12 team in this league is. Well, Josh.. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to play fantasy football, son. You're going to need something a little bit better this week against the #2 ranked squad in the league.
6. Cherns-- 3-3. 77 points in the starting line-up last week. 96 on the bench. Lost to the #11th ranked team in the league. Still yapping when he has a chance. Still proclaiming that he can win the league at any moment.... "WELL... we're waiting."
5. Perrins-- 3-3. Scored the most points in the league last week and downed the #4 squad by about a 40 spot. Then, naturally, claimed his squad was putting it all together. It was the best week of the year because your guys played out of their minds. It's the law of averages, bro, this week won't be a repeat.. but it is a big game as he's taking on #1 and their is high tension between the 2 squads as Perrins philosophy with the worst team in the league is to say, "I'm gonna make an offer he can't refuse." as he attempts to give up a 3rd round pick for a top 5 RB.
4. Cloughs-- 4-2. Coming off a loss to Pesky Perrins and now taking on the #3 squad in fantasy. No TE rostered as several trades appear to have fallen through and half the roster on a bye week? No worries. He's got a QB that can't really throw and a white WR in the starting line-up. Crass, I've only got one thing to say to you... "CAN YOU DIG IT?"
3. Crass-- 4-2 and scored 126 last week despite 2 players scoring 0 in the starting line-up. RBs continue to carry this squad as Jeff Tuel appears to be in line to make a start at the QB position. Tuel is Wazzu's QB, which could be good because it's Mike Leach.. but Tuel hasn't started in a few weeks and was mediocre replacing their other hack QB last week at Oregon State. If he doesn't start this week, that could be a huge loss of points. Guess he shoulda maybe checked FA for a QB this week but probably just took the Godfather's advice to Spend time with the family.
2. T-Raz-- 5-1 and clearly hanging out with the Blues Brothers. We're on a mission from God. Stole Geno Smith from Perrins. Picked up FA Oregon D after Cloughs dropped them and since then they've scored 42, 19, and 22 points. Some Texas RB that averages like 2.5 yards a carry has had like 20+ point weeks back to back. The Geno show heads in vs. the #7 squad, Josh, this week. Expect the Ws to follow.
1. Booster-- Raged over a trade attempt with P90X Joe where he offered multiple picks and a player, to get no response.. only to have said player traded to Perrins (in process at least) for a 3rd round pick. Shoddy by Perrins and Joe, Booster took a stand against the injustice. Perrins/P90X Joe put their little brains together to come up with the standard, "Billy annoyed me and I can trade with whoever I want" text later that night. Good one guys. Didn't take many higher level thinking courses at UW, eh? Booster is incensed because he's taking on #5 Perrins this week, who is quickly becoming a thorn in his side. Braxton Miller gets a horrible Indiana Defense but Marcus Lattimore gets one of the nation's best in LSU. Will that be enough to overcome Johnny Manziel vs. La Tech and maybe Mike "O" G on the Perrins squad? Billy only has one question for Perrins.. Do you feel lucky?
12. P90X Joe-- After being called out by the resident league bully, Booster Billy, (that's alliteration) P90X Joe went on a tirade never seen before in these fantasy circles. Some say his motivation and intensity might have enabled Uncle Rico to throw a football over them mountains or put Neil Armstrong on the moon, but the old timers.. the guys that have been around before, they saw through the words and saw the real message.. IT WASNT OVER WHEN THE GERMANS BOMBED PEARL HARBOR. Look out Billy.. P90X is 0-6 right now and had a league low 66 points last week. So, lets hope the workout isnt the only thing changing.
11. Zach-- Ripped off another win, locking up former fellow Marawood star, Cherns, 95-77 and displaying that typical Edgar tenacity. QBs can score at will, Ontario Smith might let loose in the Georgia Tech backfield, still searching at WR, but still has the Va Tech defense even though they aren't the d of years past. As Zach walked off the field victorious, he might have forgot how it felt... "Now, what am I doing?" he probably wondered as he sat in his office Sunday getting ready for this week.
10. Joe Dub-- 2-4 with 89 points last week? 3 RBs combined for 17 points, Kicker managed a 1 spot but the defense canceled that out with a -1. Ouch. If I'm Andre Ellington and I'm sitting there on this roster, I might go up to ol' Coach Joe-Dub and ask him, "Are you gonna pull those pistols or whistle dixie?" Needs to really make a move to get things going.
9. Scuba-- 759 points. 4th most in the league! Sure looks good. "Ya, but I shoot with this hand." 2-4 record. Not so much. Scored 101 last week, has young talent, a stud senior QB for points.. but can't seem to get the right match-up weekly. A lost season for the record, but solid for his team's development. He's like David Copperfield right now, I'm going to score points and entertain you, but in the end it was just a show and not real.
8. Brian-- 3-3 and coming off a beatdown. 73 points? A whopping 23 points on the bench? You want the truth, Brian? Do you? You can't handle the truth, but I'm going to tell you anyway. Last year was a fluke! Not sure I've seen a fall this far, this fast from near title contention. On the plus side, this team is young with some players that get the ball a lot but need to do more with it.
7. Josh-- 3-3. 2 straight "wins." Thinks his team is on a roll now, last week he won by 4 points. And scored 70 points. That tells you how bad the #12 team in this league is. Well, Josh.. Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to play fantasy football, son. You're going to need something a little bit better this week against the #2 ranked squad in the league.
6. Cherns-- 3-3. 77 points in the starting line-up last week. 96 on the bench. Lost to the #11th ranked team in the league. Still yapping when he has a chance. Still proclaiming that he can win the league at any moment.... "WELL... we're waiting."
5. Perrins-- 3-3. Scored the most points in the league last week and downed the #4 squad by about a 40 spot. Then, naturally, claimed his squad was putting it all together. It was the best week of the year because your guys played out of their minds. It's the law of averages, bro, this week won't be a repeat.. but it is a big game as he's taking on #1 and their is high tension between the 2 squads as Perrins philosophy with the worst team in the league is to say, "I'm gonna make an offer he can't refuse." as he attempts to give up a 3rd round pick for a top 5 RB.
4. Cloughs-- 4-2. Coming off a loss to Pesky Perrins and now taking on the #3 squad in fantasy. No TE rostered as several trades appear to have fallen through and half the roster on a bye week? No worries. He's got a QB that can't really throw and a white WR in the starting line-up. Crass, I've only got one thing to say to you... "CAN YOU DIG IT?"
3. Crass-- 4-2 and scored 126 last week despite 2 players scoring 0 in the starting line-up. RBs continue to carry this squad as Jeff Tuel appears to be in line to make a start at the QB position. Tuel is Wazzu's QB, which could be good because it's Mike Leach.. but Tuel hasn't started in a few weeks and was mediocre replacing their other hack QB last week at Oregon State. If he doesn't start this week, that could be a huge loss of points. Guess he shoulda maybe checked FA for a QB this week but probably just took the Godfather's advice to Spend time with the family.
2. T-Raz-- 5-1 and clearly hanging out with the Blues Brothers. We're on a mission from God. Stole Geno Smith from Perrins. Picked up FA Oregon D after Cloughs dropped them and since then they've scored 42, 19, and 22 points. Some Texas RB that averages like 2.5 yards a carry has had like 20+ point weeks back to back. The Geno show heads in vs. the #7 squad, Josh, this week. Expect the Ws to follow.
1. Booster-- Raged over a trade attempt with P90X Joe where he offered multiple picks and a player, to get no response.. only to have said player traded to Perrins (in process at least) for a 3rd round pick. Shoddy by Perrins and Joe, Booster took a stand against the injustice. Perrins/P90X Joe put their little brains together to come up with the standard, "Billy annoyed me and I can trade with whoever I want" text later that night. Good one guys. Didn't take many higher level thinking courses at UW, eh? Booster is incensed because he's taking on #5 Perrins this week, who is quickly becoming a thorn in his side. Braxton Miller gets a horrible Indiana Defense but Marcus Lattimore gets one of the nation's best in LSU. Will that be enough to overcome Johnny Manziel vs. La Tech and maybe Mike "O" G on the Perrins squad? Billy only has one question for Perrins.. Do you feel lucky?
October 5, 2012
Week 5 Rankings
Apparently several of the league members aren't the brightest bulbs there are (insert any other cliche here), because they think I make the rankings up and then call me out for where they're ranked in emails. That's simply not true, my job is to tally the rankings and then find comments that fit where they're ranked. Don't hate the messenger.. it might take another season for four for guys like Perrins to understand this.. he did after all, trade GINO SMITH FOR CODY HOFFMAN and then claimed Hoffman as an All-American candidate. Yeah, he's scoring 8 ppg in our league. Sweet.
12. Big Joe--0-5. Changing his name in order of a revival of sorts.. tough to revive somebody that's never lived but there needs to be a change of pace here. Wondering how long he'll be the league doormat or if we need to change the doormat's name to.. Big Joe. "You're the Big Joe of the league" might be a new saying. Stay hot, Big Joe.
11. Zach-- 1-4. Struggling and putting guys on the block. Lunt's down with an injury, will he get his job back? Eddy Lacy losing carries in a loaded Alabama backfield. Things aren't looking good for him right now, but it's not because he's not trying. Needs some solid FA pickups and a big draft. Who knows.. maybe he's playing the wrong football?
10. Perrins-- 2-3. GM of the year still working 8 PPG Cody Hoffman into his star studded line-up. Just for reference, last week Geno Smith had over 70 points.. at 8 PPG it'll take Hoffman another 4 weeks to get there and we've played 5 weeks already. Naturally, this doesn't stop Perrins from talking trash, he reminds you of the little rat down the street that just doesn't learn and really needs somebody to shut him up. Perrins is the fake Don King, I'm Rocky Balboa.
9. Joe Dub-- 2-3. Forgot a league member in voting, I released information that he's from Cudahy.. thinks aren't looking good for him right now. Last week he signed a TE to play RB and the league got cranky despite them voting down any rule that said differently, thankfully they haven't closely examined his Dexter McCluster clone on the roster.. thankfully he's 9th so it doesn't really matter right now. Lets just hope he wakes up and doesn't turn into a zombie.
8. Josh-- 2-3. Remodeling his house yet has taken time from him being on top of the league.. remember the last time he was near the top he had a 1 man band? Graham Harrell. Ha, that clown can't even hand the ball off right now. Hilarious. Lots of bye weeks and lots of youth on this roster now, might be an ugly end to the season.
7. Scuba-- 2-3. Some have him much higher, but a league member (Joe Dub) forgot to vote for him. Sure it was accidental, but is this the type of action that creates some fireworks in the league. Does Joe Dub want Scuba's nickname? Or maybe some of the young talent he's harboring on that roster? Joe hasn't come out to defend himself, but Scuba won't take this lightly.
6. Brian-- 3-2. Might be quitting on the season, put Justin Hunter on the block and looks like he might try to reload for the future. Can't say I blame him, the youth is bleak and he knows what it takes to get back on top of the league after his good finish last year. More than you can say for his favorite NFL team, the Vikings. Perhaps, he shouldn't quit.. but sit down and watch this.
5. Cherns-- 3-2. The mouth from the south was MIA this week, as he is most weeks. It's what he does. It's who he is. Too busy for life. Going to burn himself out with this work thing, needs to realize he alone can't carry America on his back. He needs to realize he has some serious talent on his squad and get them to produce week in and week out. A lot of gaudy averages and projections, youth and experience.. he might be priming himself up for a run.
4. Crass-- 3-2. Also hanging around the top of the leader board primed to make a run. Not a lot of depth on the squad but Steadman Bailey might go bananas at anytime like he did last week. Epic week. The rest of the team does just enough to get him wins, but I'd be surprised if he finished in a money bowl game. I'd say he's an optical illusion.
3. Chad-- 4-1. Somehow defeated Bill, is 4-1 and only 3rd in the rankings? Only 1 first place vote? This league has some haters, but that's what haters do.. haters hate. Denard Robinson, Montee Ball, Jonathan Franklin, Terrence Williams all lead this squad as seniors so it might be awhile before he's back on the top of the league. He has to reap the benefits as soon as possible so he brought in some motivation to take on Perrins this week, who is actually projected to win and talking smack all week.
2. T-Raz-- 4-1. Will T-Raz win and really give some of his winnings to Perrins because of the Geno Smith for Cody Hoffman deal? There are rumors circulating there was a secret handshake for this trade, but it'll be tough to prove without being able to review cell phone records and secretly KGB recorded conversations. League officials are reviewing the trade and all these records, no stone will be left unturned to see if this was a cheating violation. Week 9 might be the best time to knock him off again with Austin and Smith on a bye week.
1. Billy-- 4-1. Beatdown on national TV, game of the week.. ABC/ESPN had Herbstreit in the house with Musberger and nothing changed in the rankings. He's got a real voodoo spell on the league to keep him on top right now, is this deck of cards crumbling? Braxton looked human and the RBs weren't electric as usual. Got a big night from Marquis Lee last night, so he's still throwing haymakers and not going to let go of the #1 spot easily.
12. Big Joe--0-5. Changing his name in order of a revival of sorts.. tough to revive somebody that's never lived but there needs to be a change of pace here. Wondering how long he'll be the league doormat or if we need to change the doormat's name to.. Big Joe. "You're the Big Joe of the league" might be a new saying. Stay hot, Big Joe.
11. Zach-- 1-4. Struggling and putting guys on the block. Lunt's down with an injury, will he get his job back? Eddy Lacy losing carries in a loaded Alabama backfield. Things aren't looking good for him right now, but it's not because he's not trying. Needs some solid FA pickups and a big draft. Who knows.. maybe he's playing the wrong football?
10. Perrins-- 2-3. GM of the year still working 8 PPG Cody Hoffman into his star studded line-up. Just for reference, last week Geno Smith had over 70 points.. at 8 PPG it'll take Hoffman another 4 weeks to get there and we've played 5 weeks already. Naturally, this doesn't stop Perrins from talking trash, he reminds you of the little rat down the street that just doesn't learn and really needs somebody to shut him up. Perrins is the fake Don King, I'm Rocky Balboa.
9. Joe Dub-- 2-3. Forgot a league member in voting, I released information that he's from Cudahy.. thinks aren't looking good for him right now. Last week he signed a TE to play RB and the league got cranky despite them voting down any rule that said differently, thankfully they haven't closely examined his Dexter McCluster clone on the roster.. thankfully he's 9th so it doesn't really matter right now. Lets just hope he wakes up and doesn't turn into a zombie.
8. Josh-- 2-3. Remodeling his house yet has taken time from him being on top of the league.. remember the last time he was near the top he had a 1 man band? Graham Harrell. Ha, that clown can't even hand the ball off right now. Hilarious. Lots of bye weeks and lots of youth on this roster now, might be an ugly end to the season.
7. Scuba-- 2-3. Some have him much higher, but a league member (Joe Dub) forgot to vote for him. Sure it was accidental, but is this the type of action that creates some fireworks in the league. Does Joe Dub want Scuba's nickname? Or maybe some of the young talent he's harboring on that roster? Joe hasn't come out to defend himself, but Scuba won't take this lightly.
6. Brian-- 3-2. Might be quitting on the season, put Justin Hunter on the block and looks like he might try to reload for the future. Can't say I blame him, the youth is bleak and he knows what it takes to get back on top of the league after his good finish last year. More than you can say for his favorite NFL team, the Vikings. Perhaps, he shouldn't quit.. but sit down and watch this.
5. Cherns-- 3-2. The mouth from the south was MIA this week, as he is most weeks. It's what he does. It's who he is. Too busy for life. Going to burn himself out with this work thing, needs to realize he alone can't carry America on his back. He needs to realize he has some serious talent on his squad and get them to produce week in and week out. A lot of gaudy averages and projections, youth and experience.. he might be priming himself up for a run.
4. Crass-- 3-2. Also hanging around the top of the leader board primed to make a run. Not a lot of depth on the squad but Steadman Bailey might go bananas at anytime like he did last week. Epic week. The rest of the team does just enough to get him wins, but I'd be surprised if he finished in a money bowl game. I'd say he's an optical illusion.
3. Chad-- 4-1. Somehow defeated Bill, is 4-1 and only 3rd in the rankings? Only 1 first place vote? This league has some haters, but that's what haters do.. haters hate. Denard Robinson, Montee Ball, Jonathan Franklin, Terrence Williams all lead this squad as seniors so it might be awhile before he's back on the top of the league. He has to reap the benefits as soon as possible so he brought in some motivation to take on Perrins this week, who is actually projected to win and talking smack all week.
2. T-Raz-- 4-1. Will T-Raz win and really give some of his winnings to Perrins because of the Geno Smith for Cody Hoffman deal? There are rumors circulating there was a secret handshake for this trade, but it'll be tough to prove without being able to review cell phone records and secretly KGB recorded conversations. League officials are reviewing the trade and all these records, no stone will be left unturned to see if this was a cheating violation. Week 9 might be the best time to knock him off again with Austin and Smith on a bye week.
1. Billy-- 4-1. Beatdown on national TV, game of the week.. ABC/ESPN had Herbstreit in the house with Musberger and nothing changed in the rankings. He's got a real voodoo spell on the league to keep him on top right now, is this deck of cards crumbling? Braxton looked human and the RBs weren't electric as usual. Got a big night from Marquis Lee last night, so he's still throwing haymakers and not going to let go of the #1 spot easily.
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