Team Preview: 1st Place "Scuba Steve"

Am I crazy? Perhaps, I am not the smartest man around and never have been accused as such. Scuba is coming to the league taking over a once depleted roster, bare bones, full of Michigan players and transfers that amounted to.. well... nothing about the same as Rich Rodriguez accomplished there. Then, after one season, he could potentially be first. The league may investigate this turnaround, it's John Calipari like, and everybody except the NCAA apparently knows where there's smoke.. there's fire.

Speaking of fire, where's there is fire and gunshots; there is often Seagal. He is everywhere. I wasn't sure which Seagal movie to use, but I went with one of my favorites, at least, one that I knew some of the plot "On Deadly Ground". The plot is something like, an oil company makes money on Eskimo ground and has faulty equipment. An oil rig blows up, and they try to cover corners, but Seagal knows about their dirty tactics. Seagal, naturally, one with nature undergoes a vision quest and learns the truth. The dirty oil company comes to the village blazing and angers Seagal (UH OH). Seagal eludes the bad guys while killing any that stand in his way til he gets to the top and drowns the dude in his own oil... AND BLOWS IT UP! The best part? He doesn't get charged for any crimes AND delivers a speech to end the movie at an Alaska state convention. That, my friends, is a movie.

Huh? Who cares about Scuba's roster.. I was just in a zone remembering "On Deadly Ground," how does that compare to Scuba's roster? Well, like I said, Scuba came from nowhere just like Seagal in the movie, just there.. minding his own business. Then bam, he's in place and has to take down the rest of the league trying to keep the new guy down. He's allegedly undergone a visionquest which told him to trade for Robert Griffin. He became one with the land and now has WR's like Jermaine Kearse and Alshon Jeffrey. He's as fast as a deer on the ground with Kniles Davis. So, he's kind of Seagal or Norris in Walker, Texas Ranger.

Best Player: Alshon Jeffrey
Breakout Player: Robert Griffin
Most Overrated Player: Jermaine Kearse

You HAVE to watch this unreal clip, I understand it's like 5 minutes.. haha, but it is so hilarious. By the way, who ends a bar fight with the hand slap game for a free punch? Seagal might be the only guy on the planet, thankfully he's so fast.